Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Randomize
