Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
this boner is exhausting
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
My bed is full of blood and feathers
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
