i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize