all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
