I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize