he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
