I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
