But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Randomize
