I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize