Little spoons don't ask big questions
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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