He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
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