see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
