Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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