He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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