i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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