Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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