oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize