dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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