i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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