I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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