a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
