Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
