so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
