You can't special order awesome
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
