omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
