Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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