is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
