dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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