What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
