nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
