wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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