isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
