some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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