Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize