I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
