she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
