Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
