cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
