well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Dick very happy bro
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
