You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
he thought i was a dude.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
