pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
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