I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
