You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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