There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
