wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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