I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize