I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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