Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
FUCK WHALES
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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