I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
