ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize