More tranny stories later!
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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